Aerospace Software Ltd.

Windoze Howto

Scope

This is not a Linux Howto Guide - but like it or not, all Linux administrators have a large flock of Windoze machines to tend to. This guide is for all your friends and family, to help them take care of their own troubles...

I actually like Windows XP. It is a nice operating system to use, but the problem with Windoze (all versions) is that it has more security holes than a Swiss Cheese. A naked Windoze PC plugged into the internet will last about 20 minutes on average, before it is discovered and starts to pick up fluff.

This document briefly describes how to get a Windoze baby up and walking and how to keep it healthy and clean.

I have been using these simple techniques for many years and have several machines that are still happily running Windoze 98 or ME, although Windoze XP has matured to the point where it is less troublesome on capable hardware. In general, if a machine is faster than 500MHz, has more than 128MB memory and you can switch to Windoze XP - do so.

Security Blanket

Every baby needs a security blanket. Your Windoze baby needs one too. A proper security blanket has multiple layers.

Never plug a naked Windoze PC directly into an internet modem - unless you are a heartless, cruel monster. If you do, then it will get ill within 10 to 20 minutes. If you keep it plugged into the net while you do a first time install, the PC will be seriously ill, or die a horrible death, before you get to the end of the installation process.

Windoze runs many secret services that conveniently advertises themselves to the whole world, providing malware an easy way to respond and hitch a ride. The only way to shut the baby up, is with a separate firewall pacifier.

Pretty much the only computer systems that can be connected directly to the internet are Unix based systems. Linux and Apple Macintosh are two common kinds of Unix. The so called SOHO Firewall Routers available at office supply stores all run some common garden variety of Linux. You have to put one of these devices between your Windoze baby and the cable or DSL modem, else your baby won't survive the shock of contact with the harsh real world.

Install

Let's assume that you are a good parent and have a cheap Dlink or Netgear Firewall between your machine and the internet. Connect every piece of gear that you want to use with your PC to it - printers, cameras, scanners - and turn them all on. Insert your Windoze CDROM and start up - follow the installation wizard.

If all went well, you will end up with a working system. Now the $64000 question is how to keep it working.

Upgrade

Run Internet Explorer, head over to Microsoft.com and download the latest version of Internet Explorer (http://www.microsoft.com/windows/ie/default.mspx) and install it. This will replace a very large part of Windoze that you have so painstakingly installed a moment ago and it will plug the worst security holes.

If you are running Windoze XP, then download and install Service Pack 2 (http://www.microsoft.com/downloads/details.aspx?FamilyID=049c9dbe-3b8e-4f30-824 5-9e368d3cdb5a&displaylang=en), to fix some more holes.

The more unholy you can make the system, the longer it will last before it ascends to Windoze heaven.

Prevention Therapy

Remember this maxim of Cato: Cartago Delenda Est!

Don't use Internet Explorer if you can help it. Delete Outlook whenever you see it.

Use Internet Explorer one last time, then put it away: Go to the Mozilla Foundation (http://www.mozilla.org) and download Firefox and Thunderbird. Use these modern tools instead of the tired old Internet Explorer and Outlook.

In general, the only time you should use Internet Explorer is when you download a Windoze patch from MS, since their patch system doesn't work with any other browser. The main purpose of IE seems to be an enabler of remote spying functions and junkware.

Outlook is also quite a piece of work. When its data file approaches 2GB in size (after a year or three of heavy use), it will suddenly truncate the mail and you will lose data. Its second problem is that it is tied tightly with Internet Explorer. Windoze Media Player suffers the same fate as Outlook and is also susceptible to malicious payloads in its music files.

Don't use these malware enabler programs - Explorer, Outlook et Media Player Delenda Est!

Innoculations

Every new baby should get a full set of innoculations. Your Windoze baby is no different - this is essencial primary care.

Head over to Lavasoft (http://www.lavasoftusa.com/support/download/) and get Adaware, then go to Safer Networking (http://www.safer-networking.org/en/download/) and get Spybot S&D, now go to H+Bed (http://www.free-av.com/) and get AntiVir. Finally, go to Mike's and get his Ad Blocking Hosts File (http://www.everythingisnt.com/hosts.html) which now has a simple installer.

Shake well, install, download the latest cures and give your innocent little baby a good dollop of everything. Do use the Spybot S and D Immunize function, or your PC won't remain innocent for very long.

For good measure, I run each scanner multiple times and reboot between sessions. The problem is that some crudware hide in the Windows System Restore subsystem and will get resurrected after a reboot. Therefore, you can only relax after you have rebooted, scanned and found nothing. That doesn't mean that there is nothing, it just means that there isn't anything that the scanners can find - sigh...

Ongoing Care and Feeding

Whenever MS releases a new version of Internet Explorer, download and install it - this happens every two years or so. This is the best way to keep your Windoze baby smiling. However, every time you install Explorer, you will also get a fresh copy of Outlook, which you have to delete immediately - Écrasez l'Infâme.

For good measure, MS also gives away their own spyware program Alexa with Explorer. Adaware will remove Alexa, so always run Adaware after installing Explorer - Alexa Delenda Est!

Windoze XP has a built-in software firewall, which works fine as from Service Pack 2, but you shouldn't rely on it - you need that $50 Dlink thingy as well.

The Windows Update service resolves some problems from tme to time, but in my experience it isn't worth the trouble. If you have a Linux firewall and your email is filtered by a Linux system before it gets to your LAN, you have AntiVir installed and you use Firefox and Thunderbird instead of the default junkware, you don't use Instant Messenger and you don't use Windoze Media Player, then your baby should be OK for several months at a time.

Microsoft recently released a program called AntiSpyware, which you can download from here: http://www.microsoft.com/athome/security/spyware/software/default.mspx

It seems to help, install it, since it may save you from a big head-ache.

Elective Surgery

If you have basic surgical skills, then go to "c:/program files" and delete the directory called something like "messenger". This is not the Instant Messenger - this is the nice service that displays informative eye popping advertisements out of nowhere and is best deleted. Every time you upgrade Windoze, it will undergo a Lazarus like resurrection and you'll have to delete it again, but don't worry, you'll get never ending pop-up reminders...

Repair of Broken Windows

There are many little boys with catapults out there and they take perverse pleasure in shattering your Windows. Once shattered, it can be hard to fix.

You run Spybot S and D or Adaware and they don't seem to find anything, yet, the modem light is blinking furiously and the system is as slow as molassis. The problem is that some malicious programs are intelligent enough to disable your anti-virus and junkware protection programs.

How now brown cow? The solution is to reboot your PC into 'Safe Mode'. When the system starts up, there is short window of opportunity to get to a start-up menu, where you can select Safe Mode. This is rather tricky - you have to start the PC, then hammer away on the F8 key until the boot menu pops up. If you hammer too fast, then the system will tell you that the keyboard is broken - too slow and it will boot up normally. The sweet spot seems to be about twice per second.

Once you get into the horrible Safe Mode screen, run Anti-Vir, Adaware and Spybot S and D in succession - in each case, download the latest version first. You can bet your bottom Dollar that they will find a ton of junk that they could not find in normal mode. In Safe Mode, these tools also run a lot faster, so it is worth the reboot.

After this, life should be good again for a few weeks - provided that all the gods are smiling kindly upon you.

Removal of Stubborn Crudware

Most of the time, Spybot S and D and AntiVir will keep your machine healthy, but sometimes a machine may have some stubborn crud on it that cannot be removed by ordinary means. In these cases, it may be best to format the disk and re-install from scratch. However, as Windows is notoriously difficult to install, some people would dump the computer and buy a new one rather than go through a re-install nightmare. Considering that it may take as little as 20 minutes for a Windows machine to get re-infected with crudware, that could be expensive...

One solution is to run the cleanup tools from a known good bootable CDROM. You could for example use Knoppix and then launch ClamAV to scan the hard disk, or use the Windows equivalent of Knoppix called BartsPE and then run Spybot S&D. See this: http://www.bootcd.us/PE_Builder_intro.php and also this: http://www.nu2.nu/ for details.

Grown-up Computers

Windoze users are a very loyal, patient and forgiving lot - they can put up with anything and make excellent parents. However, if you are not the average Windoze user and is fed up to the back teeth with the ongoing issues, then do yourself a favour and get a Mandriva Linux system, or an Apple MacIntosh.

The advantage of a Mac is that you go out and buy it, unpack the box and turn it on. The advantage of a Mandriva Linux system is that you don't need to spend money, just go to Mandriva Linux (http://www.mandrivalinux.com) and download the CDROMs, then install it yourself, but you need a sense of adventure to take the plunge.

Mandriva Linux plays nice in groups - it will sense that you already have Windoze installed on your machine and will install itself such that you can dual boot your machine into either Windoze or Linux. It will also mount the Windoze disk partition such that you can access your Windoze data from Linux. Mandriva follows the old Greek tradition of 'First, do no harm'.

Another user friendly Linux is Ubuntu. This one works especially well on older hardware. Get Ubuntu here (http://www.ubuntulinux.org). A download costs nothing and Ubuntu will even send you a free CDROM, though it may take a while to get to you, since they are based in Cape Town, South Africa.

Using any of these three kinds of computers is pretty similar, since they are all descended from work done at Xerox Parc long ago - you click a start button and follow a menu to get things done - there is nothing to it from a user point of view. The main difference is that a Linux or Mac machine will run for years without trouble and they won't vacuum your wallet on an ongoing basis.

'Hope this helps!

Herman